Reflections by ‘Leminotep Jr’

When it was first published elsewhere it was promptly deleted. It was later & published in the Jamaica Gleaner of April 26, 2008.

I have often wondered how the dear departed Leminotep would have addressed events. Please permit me space to make a feeble attempt in his style.

And it came to pass that in the third month of the eighth year of the third millennium, and in the first year of the reign of Bruce the Prodigal, story did come to bump in the land of the Jamdowners. Verily I say unto thee, multitudes were confounded when what could not have happened did happen.

Hear me oh Jamdowners

E’en in the great and mighty kingdom to the north did the plague spread when the purveyors of false hope and even the sellers of snake oil were captured following dawn operations at affluent addresses. Hear me oh Jamdowners at home and in the diaspora, many were they who experienced an epiphany akin to that of Saul on that Damascus road. Some, having repented of their transgressions against the laws of mathematics and economics, proceedeth to speak from both sides of their mouth.

Verily, in the days following the great calamity there were those who did confess to knowing known unknown, unknown unknowns and not knowing that they knew not. But among the multitudes were those who prophesied of certain destruction. Verily I say unto thee, it was written that those that have eyes should see and those that have ears should hear. Wise men went about the land, e’en in cyberspace warning the multitudes of the impending disaster.

Bad mind and collusion

Dearly beloved, I say unto thee, when story did come to bump, present were members of the drunken multitude. Armed with placards extolling the virtues of the chief purveyor of hope, they proceedeth to direct their wrath against agent of the state alleging bad mind and collusion with the keepers of deposits.

Hear me oh Jamdowners and Jamrockers, dreadlocks and baldheads, blower of trumpets and ringers of bells, get not thee complacent because more financial plague will befall the land. Was it not written that the fool and his riches shall soon part? Take thee heed of the laws of mathematics and economics and heed the words of their prophets. Listen not to the wolves wrapped in sheep garments ‘profit-sying’ of great returns to come. Great shall be the pain of the transgressors. Selah.

Truth can never be suppressed.


5 Responses

  1. Excellent. Hilarious. Amen.

  2. do not understand

  3. ‘Take heed the laws of mathematics and economics’

    A classic article

  4. Funny indeed…..

  5. Great job Leminotep, Jr

    I use to work with the great Leminotep at the former Jamaica Daily News, the birth place of the Leminotep column.

    I believe you caught the fever.

    Mikey Wint
    Cousin to Carl Wint of Manchester JA

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